ChaseMacri.com » Work

The characters I deal with on a daily basis

Chase — Fri, 04 Sep 2009 06:47:05 +0000

As with many jobs in the service industry, you deal with some strange people. Many of my tweets lately have reflected such weirdos that enter Hartford Coffee Company and the weird things they do. These weirdos have nicknames, but I realize after receiving a few responses from some of you that you don’t have the same inside information behind their nicknames and the reasons why they’re so funny as I do. Well, I intend to fix that. Let’s start with one particularly loathed weirdo: #freepaperlady.

To preface #freepaperlady‘s behavior, I need to explain a bit about our store. We carry the St. Louis Post Dispatch. It costs $1 (plus 10 cents tax.) People often buy the Post, or bring their own in, and read it in the store over a meal or just coffee. Some even leave their’s behind for others to enjoy (or for us to trash/recycle for them, whatever.) We even have a little cart by the door underneath our dish bus that collects these used papers. This is a courtesy for our guests.

Well, in comes #freepaperlady (which as a nickname was coined by @travisbursik I think, he was the first person I heard say it anyway.) This lady is older, probably upper 50′s, who comes into the store in the last hour we’re open any given evening. Let me clarify, she only comes into the store in the last hour we’re open. She immediately looks underneath the bus for the day’s Post. It’s usually there. She picks up the paper, walks over to the bar and ~~asks~~stops me from the closing tasks I’m busy doing to ask for a *ahem* free cup of water. After receiving such a cup, she then finds somewhere in the cafe to sit and spread the paper out. Literally, pages strewn about all over whatever table she’s sitting at. When she finally gets up and leaves the store, usually a few minutes before close, she doesn’t return the paper to where she found it & she doesn’t put her free water cup in the bus. She leaves it all on the table for me to clean up which is rude even for our paying (and tipping!) customers. We are not a full service restaurant and you’re not a paying customer. Thanks a lot biz.

Sometimes, and boy do I relish these times, they aren’t any Post’s left by other customers. Yep, no free papers for #freepaperlady. The other night was one such night! When she came in that evening, she went through her usual routine and after seeing no Post’s, she grabbed one of the free Riverfront Times which is also by the door and come up to the register for that cup of water. Well, the Post’s we have on sale are right there by the register, and we actually had two or so left. She asked me if she could just have one of the Post’s still for sale for free since “it’s so close to the end of the day.” Are you serious? I guess I could just give you a free cup of coffee as well since, you know, we close in a half an hour and I’m just going to dump it down the drain. Goodness. I tweeted about it here. While that was pretty hilarious, nothing compares to what happened tonight.

Tonight the woman came in and did her usual thing, grabbed a paper, asked for a water, make distracting small talk that distracts you from your closing task, but then the unthinkable happened. #freepaperlady takes the cup intended for water and fills it with half and half from the coffee station. This half and half hasn’t been used in hours and was probably last filled in the early afternoon. Yeah, room temperature milk that has been on the counter for probably 5 hours. Gross. Gross. Gross! It’s one thing to be cheap, but this lady is ridiculous. Next thing you know she’ll be asking us to refill the milk containers so she can have free cold milk. Then she’ll start adding sugar or honey from the condiments, or maybe even cinnamon & chocolate powder and make a free chocolate milk. I think if it gets to that point I’ll start calling her #hobolady and ya’ll will all be in on the joke.

Moving on.

A few more frequently tweeted abouts. There’s a ton of Mom’s who come into the shop with their non-descript kids for lunch. Because Hartford has a kids area, Mom’s feel pretty comfortable having group lunch sessions there so they don’t have to worry about keeping their kids entertained. This usually means a pack of wild, screaming 2-5 year olds and a bunch of oblivious Mom’s letting them run amok. One such tweets can be found here & here. (Also, #howfire is a meme I accidentally started on twitter last year when I misspelled wanting to spit “hot fire” onto something, or someone. The error was much to my chagrin and to everyone else’s delight. So much so that I eventually embraced it. Who doesn’t like begetting a meme? Unfortunately I don’t think the original tweet exists on twitter any longer. It appears twitter only allows you to go back like 3200 tweets. Lame.

There is one Mom in particular that I named #JoanCusakMom because she looks a bit like and sounds a lot like Joan Cusak. Nothing special or ridiculous about her, and she’s really nice, but she has that voice. It’s one of the few things that sets her apart from all the other Moms who buy $6 grilled cheese & peanut butter and jelly sandwiches for their screaming kids who only eat about half their meal before the plate and food is put into the bus and not the trash, $7 meals for themselves, a $1.50 8oz cup of goldfish and $3.80 latte and sometimes a $2.50 scone or scoop of ice cream but, oh God, can they not tip because they’re on a cash allowance from “Daddy” and only have so much to spend. At least that’s what I heard anyway.

As I coin new nicknames for our patrons I’ll be sure to let ya’ll know. Obviously as it happens on twitter first, then maybe later here if there’s enough confusion. Anyway, I hope you enjoyed the explanation of #freepaperlady and you’ll definitely LOL a bit more in future tweets.

Oh, and one last work related tweet about when a customer asked me if we had any Stevia.

Great Things Happen To Ordinary People

Chase — Tue, 11 Nov 2008 02:04:47 +0000

for work, when I go to college fairs and make good contacts, I mark their inquiry card with “HOTT” so I know to call them later about applying.
In the back of my mind, I had a feeling that the choice of “HOTT” was a double entendre and I partially hoped someone would think something awry was going on. As it turns out, one of the student workers kept noticing that I would write “HOTT” on some of the cards (particularly, the ones filled out by high school girls.)
Not until later, and not until after she asked why I chose to be so creepy, did a few male cards show up, and all the pieces came together. This, indeed, is the misdirection I was hoping for all along.
hahahahahaha
you are hilarious
And it’s a “pouring one out for my homie” tribute to Randy who first wrote “Randy is Hott!!!” on something of mine

Recent work

Chase — Wed, 03 Sep 2008 03:55:00 +0000

Hello all,
Here’s a quick life update.

- Started the new school year, looking to travel. College fairs and High School visits mostly in St. Louis, though some in the Quad Cities in northern Illinois, and Iowa.
- I recorded vocals for Dear Future last weekend. Brandon and Paul came down and lent their pipes to one of their new songs. They have a new EP in the works that sounds pretty promising. It seems a little down-tempo to the last one, but I think it’ll turn out pretty mature.
- I began work with Kelly Latimore last week as well. I’m very excited about this. Kelly is probably the most underrated artist currently residing in Greenville. We’re not sure exactly where to go yet, but we demoed several songs and should have a bit more direction next meeting on Thursday. I can’t wait to really develop his songs and get him a very good sounding EP/LP.
- Sunday night I watched the wonderful Steph Plant perform at Greenville’s bed and breakfast Chartreuse. Steph is probably the best singer I have ever heard in my life in person, if not ever. I’m still pretty foggy on where to take her music as I’ve never heard her perform with any other accompaniment except her guitar or mountain dulcimer. While her music would be beautiful as is, I’d like to see where we could take it. She does share similarities with Regina Spektor, and her music is primarily piano and Regina, though a few songs are more produced. Regina also has a bit more of a pop feel, which lends itself to beats and such other glitter.
- Lastly, there may be a very interested development with me and the studios here in Greenville. More on that when more is known.

That is all until the future is here.

#18 – Allen Ginsberg, Greil Marcus and the Metrolink

Chase — Sat, 01 Sep 2007 08:23:00 +0000

I step out of my motor vehicle and hear two men arguing about the nation
“Our problem isn’t foreign oil dependency, our problem is outsourcing!”
Their arms raised in the air to hammer down the point
All I hear is the speaker box
Skipping across concrete tiles and grey stairways to a live wire bridge I hear the muffled sounds of the 4:28 westbound:
Destination Shewsbury come hell or high water or an electrical power outage
The sound from the train so badly distorted and echoey even the driver’s mother wouldn’t have recognized her baby boy
In the half-oval underground it’s difficult to distinguish the voice of man from the voice of a cartoon monster or muppet
Was it Animal or Cookie Monster?
The next approaching train sounds like the building of the next Midwest storm
Wind rushing towards me from the west as though the skies ass is about to fall out any second
“Attention passengers. The next eastbound train will be arriving in thirty seconds” the speakerbox garbles as if we cannot hear the approaching thunder and whirlwind
Even so, the information flows forth and is oft times ignored, this time too
The train comes to a resting point and doors swing open, I board
Two men with nothing visually in common are talking together
I catch bits and pieces, mostly random bullshit about TV
My orator in the driver’s seat is soft spoken yet firm, his voice is deep but delicate with a slight lisp kind of like he contains some great power yet restrained, but he’s too shy to assert himself noway
Also, he’s too disinterested to extend any more effort than necessary
His sentences are short, having deleted all excess language long ago. Simplified, Efficient
A man in a white polo with light and dark blue stripes who, until this moment, had been seated two seats in front of me, exits the train two stops after I got on
With his white ear phones he is unaware of the chance music surrounding him and the beauty that is found in the distinct combination of those sounds and the sights that created them
The train pummels forward
Powered by some unseen, Edisonian force
We do not chug we glide
and the breaks screech like a baby pig through an iron grinder
“I’ve tried nineteen times” the man in the black fedora says so emphatically, as if it’s true, but we all know he’s exaggerating to make his point and I quickly lose interest in his noise
Half way there, stop 3, Central West End
Link to link to link in view; train, shuttle, bus
We’ve gotta get where we’re going even if we don’t know where we’ve been
From time to time I look up and I see the world like never before
This time I see an electrician in his uniform beige grey blue
With glasses, greying hair and a handle bar mustache you can see his kids dangling from like some kind of swing
He’s chewing gum
It was for a second, yet time stretches
It becomes unreliable
What was only a moment
a quick distracting glance has turned into an extended shot and into a scene
A turning point
The sound of trumpets and fanfare
I do not quickly forget his gaze and his crossed arms, his look of “this is who I am, what I do, and what I will continue to do”
Yet his eyes seem to be saying something else
As though his eyes know that he’s seen what he’d rather continue to do
He prays for it, but doesn’t put too much stock into it for what are the chances
A man has to maintain a sense of pride in what he does or he goes…
In the last moments of the train I recall that I have a destination
I got on this train as a means to an end
The trip was for a superficial purpose, not for what it turned out to be
I’m surprised, even startled when I get up
I move to the place I’m going
This is what I do and will continue to do for months
Another 4
or 6
Or…
Do my eyes lie?
Do they say I’ve seen the face of God and cannot settle for less?

#16 – Tired

Chase — Mon, 27 Aug 2007 03:11:00 +0000

tired as a long, hard day in hell when Satan dropped by to check our progress…

Metrolink

Chase — Tue, 31 Jul 2007 03:12:38 +0000

I take the Metrolink to Starbucks at Union Station when I work. It’s midtown, which isn’t as bad as downtown but its still St. Louis city. Sometimes I get nervous, but I’ve been more than okay thus far and probably will be. People have to get where they’re going and that’s all they’re concerned about mostly.

Today I sat next to a man named Leroy Davis while waiting for the next Shrewsberry/I-44 link. He had a Bible in his hand, and when I walked up to him I mentioned how I’ve never been asked to show my Metrolink pass in the three weeks I’ve been using the link. It was a first. He said that some people link to use the link for free, and they may be poor, they may be not, but they check every once and a while. He got to talking about how he is rich because God has blessed him, and God, that is Jesus Christ, has given him many things to be thankful for and to feel blessed by. He was quite encouraging. We talked about riches for a few minutes, I said few things, he said many. I tried to be quiet, and let that man be Jesus to me.

At first I was taken aback, but I hope Leroy has a good night, and that he will continue to be truly blessed. He invited me to his church. The Bethesda Temple Church of the Apostolic Faith Inc. Haha, quite a name. I expect it’s a flopping on the floor church. Maybe I’ll go. I am looking for a place.

Fiest

Chase — Thu, 26 Jul 2007 03:19:23 +0000

So I started at Starbucks on Monday.

It’s part-time, on top of the full-time job at True. Yeah, it’s about 60 hrs a week. I worked Monday, Tuesday and Wednesday night, although I’m mostly just reading/learning the processes for things. Yesterday I made some Fraps and today I swept and mopped. Other than that, just reading. So far, it’s okay, although, in the last 3 days I have worked 34 hours. Tired I am, but optimistic.

How have I not heard Feist before? I heard them (her?) on the Starbucks radio today and I liked it a lot. So, they’re one of the next records to purchase. Others are the new Decemberists, and Rocky Volotaro.

#2 – Time

Chase — Thu, 07 Jun 2007 04:46:00 +0000

By Grace Alone, I get to spend Monday through Friday spending 10 and a half hours of my day getting prepared for, doing, and leaving work.
Minus the 6 to 7 hours of sleep I get a night,
I gladly accept the 7 or so hours of personal time I have left.
In these hours I prepare, and consume a meal.
Shower, dry, drrress.
Work-out.
Vege.
And on most days I have a to-do list of things I have to get done during my personal time.
These are usually things I don’t want to do but, again, have to.
I sometimes think after this particular to-do list is annihilated I will be free of “have to do’s” and will have many extra free timesss.
But the to-do list never ends.
I feel rushed to get things done, to then only have an hour or so before my body reminds me of just how tired it is.

While I may feel that life as it is isn’t going anywhere, I seem to be going at a sprint.

#1 – Money

Chase — Wed, 06 Jun 2007 03:16:00 +0000

money money money money money money money money money money
the rhythmic swing and sway of the typing of the above repeatedly mentioned word
5 notes and 1 rest
a word often preceded by “i dont have any” or “i need”
and life can so easily be controlled by it
i dont want to always think of it
i dont want to be fixated on it

help me find another motivation
than simply a larger paycheck

Interterm and Christmas

Chase — Fri, 23 Dec 2005 02:56:19 +0000

I just kind of realized last night interterm may be a bit crazy. Yeah, hopefully ill have time to hang out but i may be a bit overcommitted:

Monday through Friday schedule:
7am-12pm: Work at the union
12pm-1pm: Gym
1pm-5pm? (time isn’t sure yet): Attend WWII class
5pm-8pm: Chill
8pm-2am: Studio

Then sleep till work the next day… I hope this isn’t too much

Commercialization or not, I love Christmas.