This may be God’s plan, but I just don’t see it

im so tired of looking at you
i dont know how i deceived myself into thinking you could somehow, someway be lovable
you're a disgrace to yourself
you make me sick
im just so digusted thinking about what it is that goes on in that mind of yours
you cant even look at me when im talking to you
it makes you ashamed, doesnt it?
as it should
just crawl up into a hole and die
arent i the big talker?
i can use such colorful language to describe myself
how i hate what ive become
i dont see how there's any coming back
if this is Your plan please fulfill it
because im so screwed up…

may my dreams take me away from myself
to a far off place
and forget where i left me
so i can wake up a whole new person

God, let me be someone else
Oh God, let me do it all over again

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