Crush

What makes one feel for another?
What in particular is so exciting?
Your hair has changed twice since I've known you, is it that?
You've been afar?
You're oh-so smart?
Have I always had this crush?
Yes, but why?
Why has it aggravated into something more than a simple like?
Is it my availability?
Is it my newfound loneliness?
Is it because you've been gone and I didn't realize how much I missed you?
I gets worse the later it is.
I want to be able to call you all the time but it would be awkward and I hate imposing. I often, nearly always, feel like I'm taking up your time with my uninteresting life always trying to come up with something incredibly interesting to say to you just to keep your attention.
Can I just be myself when I talk to you?
Is that enough?
It seemed to keep you laughing this past weekend.
Would I make you laugh for a lifetime?
Is that a silly thing to even ask?
But God, do I want that.
I'm lost on end, I need direction.

Feelings are so unreliable but they're always there. I don't know any other way to say it.

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