High Fidelity Notes

Notes on High Fidelity

“Did I listen to pop music because I was miserable, or was I miserable because I listened to pop music.”
“If you really wanted to mess me up, you should’ve gotten to me earlier.”
“and then they were there, and they had grown breasts, and we wanted them.”
“Our relationship lasted 6 hours, two hours after school after the rockford files, for three afternoon, but on the fourth afternoon, Kevin Bannister.”
“It was like trying to borrow a dollar, and asking for 50 grand instead.”
“I get by because people make a special effort to shop here. Mostly young men… I’d feel bad taking their money if I wasn’t kind of one of them.”
“I don’t want to hear old, sad bastard music, I just want something I can ignore.”

Charlie “She was the kind of girl I wanted to meet, ever since I wanted to meet girls. I mean she was different, she was dramatic, she was exotic, and she said remarkably interesting things about books, and film, and music, and she talked a lot, and she liked me…”
“Why would a girl… no, a woman, want to go out with me? I felt like a fraud, like one of those kids that shaved their heads and said they’d always been punks.”
“I became convinced that she was going to leave me [for the dreaded Marco.]’
“Charlie, you fucking bitch, let’s work it out.” Shouting, in the rain, then tripping over the curb. Then I lost it. Lost it all; faith, dignity, about 15 pounds.’
“I guess I never really got over Charlie. She out of my class, too pretty, too smart, too witty.”

“You’ll pay big.”
Into the back room crying. He invites the introspective, awkward, “in-touch with their emotions” kind of people.
“Do you want to talk about it?” “No, thank you though, Dick. Thank you.”
Smelling clothing. “I used to dream of days like these, to be surrounded by women’s underwear. Now I know they save their best pairs till the night they know they were gonna sleep with someone.”
“It’s just so painful, and draining, I’m just going to be by myself for a while.” “Me too.” Then we started making out.
“Only people of a certain disposition are frightened of being alone at the age of 26.”
“I’m alright if that’s what’s upsetting you. Laura didn’t want to get married, she’s not that kind of girl, that’s not what happens now.”
“John Dillinger was shot dead behind that theatre by the FBI in a hail of gunfire. You know who tipped them off? His fucking girlfriend. He just wanted to see a movie.”

Even their argument is a song.
do you still love me?
its not the issue
what else is there
i hope we’re not in love
it would give me a better opinion of love
did i beat you, tell you you’re a bad person
what could i have done to make you happy?
nothing, make yourself happy
why am i unhappy?
because you’re the same person you used to be
and im not
and all ive done is change jobs
[you’ve changed] clothes, and hairstyles
attitudes, and friends
i can’t go to work with my hair dyed pink
you haven’t so much changed socks as long as ive known you
come on laura, now you’re being stupid
at least you used to talk about the future
now you don’t even do that
look, im alright, you’re the one who hates their job
see, you don’t have a clue
i like my job
all im saying is
you have to allow for things to happen to people
most of all to yourself
and you don’t, rob
so what’s the use?

and she goes in her red jacket
rob stares into space with sun glasses

“how can someone who has no interest in music own a record store?”
“you’re totally elitist, you feel like the under appreciated scholars so you shit on the people you feel are beneath you. which is everybody”

Juxtapose Maria De Sal
“You might be sick of it, I could turn it off.”
“You should turn it up.”
“His horrible clothes, hair, his music, latin, bulgarian, whatever world music was popular then. Such awful smells, I didn’t like him then but I fucking hate him now.”
“No woman in the world is having better sex than the sex you’re having with Ian in my head.”
“Jackie Alden. Congratulations Laura. Number 5, with a bullet. Welcome.”

Such a timeless shot of Rob sitting behind the counter with one arm crossed over the other Hands in fists, one holding a lit cigarette that is being smoked by no one. Staring intently straight ahead at nothing, no one, expect maybe himself and that person is also no one. Rob’s eyebrows are furrowed, not unlike Jack Nicholas in the Shining, his absolute anger, his absolute despair is expressed in this shot alone as Rob has hit bottom. Sappy 60s R&B is playing and it sounds like such a joke. There’s no way in heaven or earth one person could actually sustain happiness and love for another like this song suggests and Rob here is the evidence of that. You can almost feel the heat from Rob’s body as he raises the temperature of the room. You can almost feel his gaze burning a hole right through himself and yourself as you stare back. Then a customer comes up to the counter and says “Hey, do you have soul.”
Rob responds “That all depends.” And after the phone rings he says “Back row right next to the blues.”
“Do you have soul?” is such a funny question to be asked because we think she asks “do you have A soul?” Which Rob himself isn’t sure he does. Moments later Rob and Laura’s friend Liz (played wonderfully by John’s real life sister Joan Cusak) walks in the room and confirms that Rob does not, actually, have a soul. “Hey Rob, you fucking asshole” she shouts and walks back out the same as she came. We expect a defense, but Rob knows it’s true, and we know it’s true.

“I want to see all of them on the big top 5.” “They feel good maybe, but you feel better.”
“With no real explanation, I launch into. … wanted to have sex with … and not me. Why am I doomed to be left, doomed to be rejected?”
“When you broke up with me, because I was, to use your charming expression, too tight….”
When faced with the heart ache he caused, he doesn’t give a fuck. He in fact feels good that he broke her heart, and not she his.

And what better way to exercise rejections demons then to screw the one who rejected you. But you wouldn’t be sleeping with a person, you’d be sleeping with whole, sad, single-person culture. It’d be like sleeping with Talia Shire in Rocky if you weren’t Rocky and I feel bad enough as it is.

He asks “are you coming home?”

The chance for survival. Is the sex better? I feel so good I go out and sleep with Marie DeSalle. All that charming stuff is just bullshit, but it seems to work. But it turns out she was using him for the same thing.

Again in despair, we see him running in the rain.

“Then it dawns on me. Charlie’s awful. She doesn’t listen to anyone, she apparently has no sense of humor, and she talks shit constantly.”
“Oh come on Charlie, you can say anything you want, why’d want to dump me for Marco.”
“Marco seemed a little more sure of himself. Less hard work. A little sunnier, sparkier.”

It’s a mystery of human chemistry that some people just feel like home.
It’s just your garden variety, women, schitso stuff.

Again in the rain.

Like most relationships, they seem great at first. The person is the most perfect person in the world. Everything you like about them is intoxicating, and you can’t get enough of them. This is infatuation, we all experience it. Especially when coped with the physical aspect of relations, its easy to see how such over-emotional pop songs can come out of Chris’ mouth. At the same time, once things get bad and we have the power of retrospection, we can see how terrible things really were. How wrong for us the person was. This is also shown in Chris’s songs.


Goals for this week

I’ve decided (and my wife has confirmed this) that I have very little motivation to do what I want. To combat this, yesterday I did some work on an article I’ve been talking about writing for over a month. Also, I had the thought that maybe I should make a few goals from week to week which will help me get stuff done.

Here’s this weeks goals:
– Finish reading “It Still Moves: The Search for the Next American Music”
– Remix one Pilots/When Sorrow Fails song (or, I’d accept re-tracking guitar/bass)
– Write the first section of my Dashboard article (or make notes of High Fidelity portion)*check*

So, whomever’s reading, keep me accountable.